Laughing at a little stupidity

OK. Ordinarily I just ignore little things like this but I have been laughing so hard I can’t help myself.

For you non-wrestling fans out there, last night Matt Hardy “turned” on his brother Jeff and hit him in the head with a steel chair. The flood of people yelling at Matt on his MySpace page about it is not what I found so hilarious. I figure some of them were probably playing it up, and for the ones who don’t understand that wrestling revolves around written storylines, well, they have the luck of true suspended disbelief.

What made me laugh so hard was my attempt at trying to get through most of the messages, out of sheer morbid curiosity alone. Usually I wouldn’t point out stuff that makes all wrestling fans look like complete idiots but this really applies to a large portion of the current population. For them and everyone else that posts messages of a similar ilk, I just have a few suggestions. For your future happiness, people!

1. If you type like a moron, people will automatically assume you are, in fact, a moron.

2. I would like you to look up the word “period” and check out the examples of how it should be used with a sentence. Hint: A period comes at the end of a sentence, then you start a new sentence. It helps with flow.

3. U, when used like this: “U don’t know what u did.” Well, that’s actually spelled YOU. As in “you need to learn to spell the word You.” It’s only three letters, it’s not hard.

4. Nobody is ever scrud. Nor should they go “scru” themselves. You’re looking for the word “screwed” or “screw.” As in, “Screw you, you screwed him.”

5. This is not a sentence (in fact it makes no sense at all): “i hat u ur rong!!!so much and tru its not rite!you no.” I think I might know where that was going, but it’s just a guess.

Here are some other words some of you might need a little help with:

A “hat” goes on your head. You are more likely to “hate” someone than wear him.

“Ur” is not a word. You can use “you are” or “you’re” to get that point across. It’s just a few extra letters, it won’t break your finger. And YOUR and YOU’RE are not the same thing. You might love YOUR dog, and if you do, YOU’RE going to the vet when he’s sick.

When you don’t want to do something, you might say “No” to the person. And you don’t want to do it because you “Know” it would be wrong. That’s W-R-O-N-G. Not RONG.

Truth is spelled with a t and an h. Not an f. There is no such word as Truf or Truef. Even if it sounds that way, it isn’t spelled that way. That is “true” for anybody.

There are spaces between words and sentences. Like this: “Hello, my friend. I adore you.” Not like this: “Hello my friend.Iadore you.”

My grandmother once said that if your only response is to yell, you probably need to get a hobby. Likewise, writing in all caps is completely pointless because no one ever bothers to read it. It just makes you look like you don’t have much of a life or know so little about computers that the Caps Lock key is totally foreign to you. It can be turned off, you see. A word or two here and there, sure. The whole freaking paragraph, no.

There’s only one M in the word COMING. You are not “comming” to see someone. Unless you’re in the process of becoming a communist as you go! Then you might be “comming” after all.

This is of course all meant in good fun. Hope it made someone laugh like I have been.